Daughter of George McKinley Brown and Rosa Alice Smith Brown, sister to Paul Gordon Brown, Johnny Blake Brown and Betty Marie Brown Cole - all whom are also buried in Ashelawn Memorial Gardens.
Married to Wilfred Filmore Black in 1952, divorced abt 1995 after which time she had her name legally changed back to her maiden name.
Funeral held at Pleasant Gap United Methodist Church, the church she attended in her youth and later in life. She was a strong contributor to the renovation of the church that was undertaken in abt 2001.
Funeral held May 11, 2010 at 7 pm.
Funeral Service:
1. Opening and closing of service consisted of the ringing of the "Church tower bell" (by pulling rope attached to the bell). This was rung by her grandchildren both to begin and to end the service.
2. Songs included: Sweet Bye and Bye, Shall We Gather at the River, Jesus Loves Me, Joyful Joyful We Adore Thee, The Lord's Prayer, and Simple Gifts.
3. Eulogy by her daughter: Dr. Janice Black
4. Service conducted by Rev Beverly Colombo
Eulogy for Madeline Doris Brown
Funeral Service – Pleasant Gap United Methodist Church – Madison County NC
May 11, 2010 by: Janice Black
I want to thank you all for coming tonight and I especially want to thank the folks here at Pleasant Gap UMC for hosting this special occasion.
This church has meant so much to my Mother throughout her life and to her family and I could not imagine any other place for this special celebration of our Mother's life. Yes, this church is old and maybe a little small for this occasion but the spiritual feeling from being here provides an unbelievable amount of comfort for my family.
It is so important for me to speak tonight because my Mom- as you know - was a person who always focused on others. So I want to say loud and clear……"This is my Mother!" "She was a very special person and I want our voices heard in celebration of her goodness!"
In doing this I want to touch on 3 topics. First, why this place - a little historical perspective. Second some personal stories and third - my last day with her.
Historical perspective:
• She believed and so do I that "place matters"
• She worshiped here as child / young adult, played piano here – attended here so many times and for so many years. Many times when I was a child, we would come here for church and Mom and Grandma would stay home and fix dinner – having a great meal for us when we got back.
• Legend has it this church sits on land donated by my grandfather – George Brown.
• Directly behind me 200 hundred yards is the homestead of my Great, Great Grandparents, William and Elizabeth Smith – who came to the mountains from Alamance County because of an outbreak of typhoid.
• Up to the left is land from my Great Grandfather – John Calloway (Cal) Cudd – JC – a few hundred acres – most of which is still in our family (note – he was Rosa Alice Smith Brown's father. He and Ada V Smith never married but had 2 children together, Rosa Alice and Herbert – Herbert died while serving in WWI).
• Down the road 100 yards is Papa's / Grandma's house – George and Rosa Brown – we went there almost every Saturday growing up so Mom could help Grandma clean house and cook. Then later, she lived there with my Grandfather for the last for 8-10 years of her life, caring for him, before he passed at age 100
• Off behind me to the right and up the hill is a small cemetery – the Holcombe-Clouse Cemetery – holding the graves of her sister – Edith Eloise Brown who died in 1932 (1920-1932), her Great Grandparents [William (12/8/1839-6/25/1910) and Elizabeth Smith (10/8/1840-1/27/1923) and Lewis (8/12/1820-7/9/1901) and Anca (1/15/1822-6/18/1900) Cudd] and her Grandparents [Ada V Smith (12/1/1871-4/28/1976), JC (John Calloway)(1864-1934) Cudd] – and other relatives. (FYI – dates included only for info)
• In fact 2 of the hymns sung tonight were from Edith's funeral – I found them mentioned in some papers Mom had given me – they were "Sweet Bye and Bye" and "Jesus Loves Me. - Again closing and connecting her "circle of life" so closely back to "this place."
• As is the tradition here in the mountains, this church and the small cemetery have "Decoration Sunday" – I called it the "Decoration Party" every year – a wonderful memory from our childhoods – It was a party, big lunches at Papa and Grandma Brown's house just below the church; followed by time at the grave yard-cleaning graves, spreading flowers, learning about family history – and a chance to connect with lots of cousins and other relatives. One of the nice things about those experiences in the graveyard and "Decoration Sunday" was coming to better understand death as a part of life-a sad part, but a part.
Today, so many things about death are held from us – so we don't see the process - but in being denied involvement in and celebrating the lives of the dead – it makes it seem all the more scary.
• Lastly from a historical perspective – Mom has been a strong supporter of this church.
• So her history is here – our history is here and we believe a "sense of place "has been and is important to the foundations of our lives – what better place to "send her a message" to heaven than from here – this place.
Second: I want to speak briefly on some stories of my life with her that speaks to who she was as a person. As the obituary stated, she was a family centered, loving, caring, patient person (patience which I did try to break on many occasions) and finally a life-long learner.
• I will not rehash all the details about her education – but she was a life-long learner who wanted to experience the wonders of the world and share it with others – lately she satisfied this need by bus trips with Aunt Mary Ruth and Aunt Elezene and maybe others of you here. She loved the bus trips and all the great things she saw and experienced. One trip just last year, she and Elezene went to the west coast for 8-10 days and it was the first time Elezene had ever been on a plane. She was so excited that part of her "experience" for that trip was seeing Elezene on a plane for the first time.
• Lindsey – first grandchild – Her opportunity to make it known she wanted to be called "Granny" in honor of her "Granny" Ada V. Smith who meant so much to her. It was also her opportunity to see how much of her I had absorbed in my new role – me now as a Mom. With Lindsey she was able to enjoy – all the baby firsts again – all the way thorough to young adult hood. She marveled at Lindsey ability to learn another language and go to Spain and South America – another example of embracing learning and having new experiences
• Greg: Second grandchild and the opportunity to see what a wonderful father her son was becoming. She marveled at Greg's intensity, drive, focus and outstanding athletic ability.
• Kim: A whirl of energy – always doing things and taking initiative that impressed Granny, Granny marveled at Kim coming home, baking cookies, making phone calls and organizing events. Kim is our real mover and shaker.
• Mason – last but not least (if you have met him you know what I mean) – the grandchild who was most "like the Brown family" in his physical build. She marveled at his juggling 3 sports and school work. As Mason got to 7th grade, girls starting texting him and so he and Granny talked about that one day – he did not like them doing but she told him [with a twinkle in her eye] "if I was a 7th grade girl – I would be texting you too."
• To all the grandchildren – she loved you more than you can imagine. She was equally proud of each of you and had complete confidence in your abilities to move on and be a success in life.
• Next I want to highlight only a few things – I see these items more as quick visual images really versus stories and here they are.
• I remember picking blackberries on Papa's mountain (mountain top up on Brown Branch Road) every Fourth of July – sweating, ticks, chiggers, briars – that part was no fun but I sure loved the blackberry jelly.
• Then there was the picking – stringing and canning beans. Sitting under the trees in our driveway (N Main Street house), stringing beans and she would bring out what seemed like bucket after bucket. I learned very quickly that we had to be careful how I stringed them cause if I didn't do a good job then I only had myself to blame in the winter when eating beans and complaining about the "strings."
• I also remember the wonderful "soup mix" she canned each year that we mixed with hamburger for quick soups in winter time. Combination of tomatoes, potatoes, corn and okra)
• Bess Sprinkle Library in Weaverville – going there to get books, work on school projects. The whole world seemed contained in that library - so much to experience from all those books.
• I remember when the "encyclopedia salesman came to our house to sell us a set and she was so excited – it was important to her that we have a set – and we did – we used these a lot for projects but also just sitting around and reading them for fun – so much to learn from those books – for the younger set, the encyclopedia was our version of the internet.
• I remember sitting in her lap and learning to read with her arm around me – it felt so good.
• Then there were all the softball and basketball games – Coming to watch my every game through middle and high school. I always looked for her when I came out on the court of field and there she was. Sitting and sitting and sitting and watching hours of my events.
• Then homework and sewing lessons – by the way I got a new sewing machine last year – also Kim sews and Lindsey does some too. And Kim and Lindsey and I have been making peach jam for the last few years. Maybe we can get Greg and Mason into sewing or canning.
• My first trip to Myrtle Beach in spring 1966 and my first look at the ocean. I still remember that first image of the ocean, being amazed that there was no end to the water and how wonderful that was. Also she took us to a "statue garden" in the Myrtle Beach area – we were not very excited about that but she made it fun, letting us make funny poses and climb on the statues – much like these 4 grandchildren do now.
• But underneath these things, these events was her love, her patience and her pure joy in seeing and being with us.
• And yes, the education thing – she was always teasing me that "she was more educated than me" – I got my BA the same year she got her MA. I got my MA same year she got her Ed.S. Finally in 1994, I finished my Ph.D moving ahead of her in "degree attainment." But her teasing was not for competition, but pride in seeing that I, like her, loved to learn. All that "learning" can drive Lindsey and Mason crazy. When I argue with them at the house we start out with ….well the research says……….
Third my last day with her in March 2010:
• As you know we have had lots of rain this [2010] Spring. That's good but it makes the [55 Brown Branch Road] Hollar messy. I was spending the weekend in Asheville because of work I had here. Mom and I talked the night before and were not sure it would be dry enough to go the holler on Sunday but we really wanted to go. We got up Sunday morning, it was wet and messy but we decided "what the heck" let's go –we were up for it!
• First we had breakfast at Waffle House. Then we went to the Hollar and spent 2 or more hours walking and talking- some just talking about general things but some about her specific memories of living there – Papa's [George Brown] building 2 houses up by the Beech Spring before building the "big house" further down the mountain.
• Going to the Beech Spring and seeing where she craved her initials into the tree as a girl; plus seeing mine and the ones from the 4 grandchildren.
• Walking up the old road bed toward the top of the mountain where we used to pick blackberries. We were just enjoying being on land that had such personal meaning and beauty.
• When we tried to leave, we got her car stuck in the mud and we wound up having mud all over us. We considered calling AAA, but then Chris Smith (Nedra's Grandson) helped us push out her car.
• We were so muddy but we went on…… to the Holcombe –Clouse Cemetery behind us that I mentioned before – walking and talking - looking at the markers and talking about family – talking about getting Edith [her sister] a new headstone.
• We had lunch and then went back to her condo.
• I tried to clean her car a little at her condo – it was so muddy. I threw pails and pails of water on it to get some of the mud off. Finally I got enough off; that it was not too embarrassing for her to drive….it didn't look like she had competed in a "dirt" race with her Camry.
• But one thing struck me throughout the day. She must have asked me 6 times "do you have time for this" and of course the answer was "yes" – thankfully now I as I reflect on that day, that answer was "yes I have the time." It's funny, I could have easily rushed back to Winston Salem, I certainly had lots to do. But I really wanted to slow down and spend the day with her. Thankfully, the answer was "yes I have time."
• We had a wonderful day and I will always cherish that time – not more than the others but as the cherry, the finishing touch on top of all the others.
In closing I want to repeat the closing paragraph of her speech as Valedictorian of Barnardsville high School Class of 1949:
"We are not bound to make the earth go right, but we are sure we can realize our possibilities in being a part of all that liberates and lifts. Let us make loyalty our controlling spirit and show the world that we are the best citizens and truest patriots, carrying the spirit of courage and high minded integrity with which we must now bid each other farewell."
Thank you all for coming tonight and celebrating my Mom's life.
She was married for over 35 years and after several years of separation, the divorce was settled in about 1995.
Married to Wilfred Filmore Black in 1952, divorced abt 1995 after which time she had her name legally changed back to her maiden name.
Funeral held at Pleasant Gap United Methodist Church, the church she attended in her youth and later in life. She was a strong contributor to the renovation of the church that was undertaken in abt 2001.
Funeral held May 11, 2010 at 7 pm.
Funeral Service:
1. Opening and closing of service consisted of the ringing of the "Church tower bell" (by pulling rope attached to the bell). This was rung by her grandchildren both to begin and to end the service.
2. Songs included: Sweet Bye and Bye, Shall We Gather at the River, Jesus Loves Me, Joyful Joyful We Adore Thee, The Lord's Prayer, and Simple Gifts.
3. Eulogy by her daughter: Dr. Janice Black
4. Service conducted by Rev Beverly Colombo
Eulogy for Madeline Doris Brown
Funeral Service – Pleasant Gap United Methodist Church – Madison County NC
May 11, 2010 by: Janice Black
I want to thank you all for coming tonight and I especially want to thank the folks here at Pleasant Gap UMC for hosting this special occasion.
This church has meant so much to my Mother throughout her life and to her family and I could not imagine any other place for this special celebration of our Mother's life. Yes, this church is old and maybe a little small for this occasion but the spiritual feeling from being here provides an unbelievable amount of comfort for my family.
It is so important for me to speak tonight because my Mom- as you know - was a person who always focused on others. So I want to say loud and clear……"This is my Mother!" "She was a very special person and I want our voices heard in celebration of her goodness!"
In doing this I want to touch on 3 topics. First, why this place - a little historical perspective. Second some personal stories and third - my last day with her.
Historical perspective:
• She believed and so do I that "place matters"
• She worshiped here as child / young adult, played piano here – attended here so many times and for so many years. Many times when I was a child, we would come here for church and Mom and Grandma would stay home and fix dinner – having a great meal for us when we got back.
• Legend has it this church sits on land donated by my grandfather – George Brown.
• Directly behind me 200 hundred yards is the homestead of my Great, Great Grandparents, William and Elizabeth Smith – who came to the mountains from Alamance County because of an outbreak of typhoid.
• Up to the left is land from my Great Grandfather – John Calloway (Cal) Cudd – JC – a few hundred acres – most of which is still in our family (note – he was Rosa Alice Smith Brown's father. He and Ada V Smith never married but had 2 children together, Rosa Alice and Herbert – Herbert died while serving in WWI).
• Down the road 100 yards is Papa's / Grandma's house – George and Rosa Brown – we went there almost every Saturday growing up so Mom could help Grandma clean house and cook. Then later, she lived there with my Grandfather for the last for 8-10 years of her life, caring for him, before he passed at age 100
• Off behind me to the right and up the hill is a small cemetery – the Holcombe-Clouse Cemetery – holding the graves of her sister – Edith Eloise Brown who died in 1932 (1920-1932), her Great Grandparents [William (12/8/1839-6/25/1910) and Elizabeth Smith (10/8/1840-1/27/1923) and Lewis (8/12/1820-7/9/1901) and Anca (1/15/1822-6/18/1900) Cudd] and her Grandparents [Ada V Smith (12/1/1871-4/28/1976), JC (John Calloway)(1864-1934) Cudd] – and other relatives. (FYI – dates included only for info)
• In fact 2 of the hymns sung tonight were from Edith's funeral – I found them mentioned in some papers Mom had given me – they were "Sweet Bye and Bye" and "Jesus Loves Me. - Again closing and connecting her "circle of life" so closely back to "this place."
• As is the tradition here in the mountains, this church and the small cemetery have "Decoration Sunday" – I called it the "Decoration Party" every year – a wonderful memory from our childhoods – It was a party, big lunches at Papa and Grandma Brown's house just below the church; followed by time at the grave yard-cleaning graves, spreading flowers, learning about family history – and a chance to connect with lots of cousins and other relatives. One of the nice things about those experiences in the graveyard and "Decoration Sunday" was coming to better understand death as a part of life-a sad part, but a part.
Today, so many things about death are held from us – so we don't see the process - but in being denied involvement in and celebrating the lives of the dead – it makes it seem all the more scary.
• Lastly from a historical perspective – Mom has been a strong supporter of this church.
• So her history is here – our history is here and we believe a "sense of place "has been and is important to the foundations of our lives – what better place to "send her a message" to heaven than from here – this place.
Second: I want to speak briefly on some stories of my life with her that speaks to who she was as a person. As the obituary stated, she was a family centered, loving, caring, patient person (patience which I did try to break on many occasions) and finally a life-long learner.
• I will not rehash all the details about her education – but she was a life-long learner who wanted to experience the wonders of the world and share it with others – lately she satisfied this need by bus trips with Aunt Mary Ruth and Aunt Elezene and maybe others of you here. She loved the bus trips and all the great things she saw and experienced. One trip just last year, she and Elezene went to the west coast for 8-10 days and it was the first time Elezene had ever been on a plane. She was so excited that part of her "experience" for that trip was seeing Elezene on a plane for the first time.
• Lindsey – first grandchild – Her opportunity to make it known she wanted to be called "Granny" in honor of her "Granny" Ada V. Smith who meant so much to her. It was also her opportunity to see how much of her I had absorbed in my new role – me now as a Mom. With Lindsey she was able to enjoy – all the baby firsts again – all the way thorough to young adult hood. She marveled at Lindsey ability to learn another language and go to Spain and South America – another example of embracing learning and having new experiences
• Greg: Second grandchild and the opportunity to see what a wonderful father her son was becoming. She marveled at Greg's intensity, drive, focus and outstanding athletic ability.
• Kim: A whirl of energy – always doing things and taking initiative that impressed Granny, Granny marveled at Kim coming home, baking cookies, making phone calls and organizing events. Kim is our real mover and shaker.
• Mason – last but not least (if you have met him you know what I mean) – the grandchild who was most "like the Brown family" in his physical build. She marveled at his juggling 3 sports and school work. As Mason got to 7th grade, girls starting texting him and so he and Granny talked about that one day – he did not like them doing but she told him [with a twinkle in her eye] "if I was a 7th grade girl – I would be texting you too."
• To all the grandchildren – she loved you more than you can imagine. She was equally proud of each of you and had complete confidence in your abilities to move on and be a success in life.
• Next I want to highlight only a few things – I see these items more as quick visual images really versus stories and here they are.
• I remember picking blackberries on Papa's mountain (mountain top up on Brown Branch Road) every Fourth of July – sweating, ticks, chiggers, briars – that part was no fun but I sure loved the blackberry jelly.
• Then there was the picking – stringing and canning beans. Sitting under the trees in our driveway (N Main Street house), stringing beans and she would bring out what seemed like bucket after bucket. I learned very quickly that we had to be careful how I stringed them cause if I didn't do a good job then I only had myself to blame in the winter when eating beans and complaining about the "strings."
• I also remember the wonderful "soup mix" she canned each year that we mixed with hamburger for quick soups in winter time. Combination of tomatoes, potatoes, corn and okra)
• Bess Sprinkle Library in Weaverville – going there to get books, work on school projects. The whole world seemed contained in that library - so much to experience from all those books.
• I remember when the "encyclopedia salesman came to our house to sell us a set and she was so excited – it was important to her that we have a set – and we did – we used these a lot for projects but also just sitting around and reading them for fun – so much to learn from those books – for the younger set, the encyclopedia was our version of the internet.
• I remember sitting in her lap and learning to read with her arm around me – it felt so good.
• Then there were all the softball and basketball games – Coming to watch my every game through middle and high school. I always looked for her when I came out on the court of field and there she was. Sitting and sitting and sitting and watching hours of my events.
• Then homework and sewing lessons – by the way I got a new sewing machine last year – also Kim sews and Lindsey does some too. And Kim and Lindsey and I have been making peach jam for the last few years. Maybe we can get Greg and Mason into sewing or canning.
• My first trip to Myrtle Beach in spring 1966 and my first look at the ocean. I still remember that first image of the ocean, being amazed that there was no end to the water and how wonderful that was. Also she took us to a "statue garden" in the Myrtle Beach area – we were not very excited about that but she made it fun, letting us make funny poses and climb on the statues – much like these 4 grandchildren do now.
• But underneath these things, these events was her love, her patience and her pure joy in seeing and being with us.
• And yes, the education thing – she was always teasing me that "she was more educated than me" – I got my BA the same year she got her MA. I got my MA same year she got her Ed.S. Finally in 1994, I finished my Ph.D moving ahead of her in "degree attainment." But her teasing was not for competition, but pride in seeing that I, like her, loved to learn. All that "learning" can drive Lindsey and Mason crazy. When I argue with them at the house we start out with ….well the research says……….
Third my last day with her in March 2010:
• As you know we have had lots of rain this [2010] Spring. That's good but it makes the [55 Brown Branch Road] Hollar messy. I was spending the weekend in Asheville because of work I had here. Mom and I talked the night before and were not sure it would be dry enough to go the holler on Sunday but we really wanted to go. We got up Sunday morning, it was wet and messy but we decided "what the heck" let's go –we were up for it!
• First we had breakfast at Waffle House. Then we went to the Hollar and spent 2 or more hours walking and talking- some just talking about general things but some about her specific memories of living there – Papa's [George Brown] building 2 houses up by the Beech Spring before building the "big house" further down the mountain.
• Going to the Beech Spring and seeing where she craved her initials into the tree as a girl; plus seeing mine and the ones from the 4 grandchildren.
• Walking up the old road bed toward the top of the mountain where we used to pick blackberries. We were just enjoying being on land that had such personal meaning and beauty.
• When we tried to leave, we got her car stuck in the mud and we wound up having mud all over us. We considered calling AAA, but then Chris Smith (Nedra's Grandson) helped us push out her car.
• We were so muddy but we went on…… to the Holcombe –Clouse Cemetery behind us that I mentioned before – walking and talking - looking at the markers and talking about family – talking about getting Edith [her sister] a new headstone.
• We had lunch and then went back to her condo.
• I tried to clean her car a little at her condo – it was so muddy. I threw pails and pails of water on it to get some of the mud off. Finally I got enough off; that it was not too embarrassing for her to drive….it didn't look like she had competed in a "dirt" race with her Camry.
• But one thing struck me throughout the day. She must have asked me 6 times "do you have time for this" and of course the answer was "yes" – thankfully now I as I reflect on that day, that answer was "yes I have the time." It's funny, I could have easily rushed back to Winston Salem, I certainly had lots to do. But I really wanted to slow down and spend the day with her. Thankfully, the answer was "yes I have time."
• We had a wonderful day and I will always cherish that time – not more than the others but as the cherry, the finishing touch on top of all the others.
In closing I want to repeat the closing paragraph of her speech as Valedictorian of Barnardsville high School Class of 1949:
"We are not bound to make the earth go right, but we are sure we can realize our possibilities in being a part of all that liberates and lifts. Let us make loyalty our controlling spirit and show the world that we are the best citizens and truest patriots, carrying the spirit of courage and high minded integrity with which we must now bid each other farewell."
Thank you all for coming tonight and celebrating my Mom's life.
She was married for over 35 years and after several years of separation, the divorce was settled in about 1995.
Daughter of George McKinley Brown and Rosa Alice Smith Brown, sister to Paul Gordon Brown, Johnny Blake Brown and Betty Marie Brown Cole - all whom are also buried in Ashelawn Memorial Gardens.
Married to Wilfred Filmore Black in 1952, divorced abt 1995 after which time she had her name legally changed back to her maiden name.
Funeral held at Pleasant Gap United Methodist Church, the church she attended in her youth and later in life. She was a strong contributor to the renovation of the church that was undertaken in abt 2001.
Funeral held May 11, 2010 at 7 pm.
Funeral Service:
1. Opening and closing of service consisted of the ringing of the "Church tower bell" (by pulling rope attached to the bell). This was rung by her grandchildren both to begin and to end the service.
2. Songs included: Sweet Bye and Bye, Shall We Gather at the River, Jesus Loves Me, Joyful Joyful We Adore Thee, The Lord's Prayer, and Simple Gifts.
3. Eulogy by her daughter: Dr. Janice Black
4. Service conducted by Rev Beverly Colombo
Eulogy for Madeline Doris Brown
Funeral Service – Pleasant Gap United Methodist Church – Madison County NC
May 11, 2010 by: Janice Black
I want to thank you all for coming tonight and I especially want to thank the folks here at Pleasant Gap UMC for hosting this special occasion.
This church has meant so much to my Mother throughout her life and to her family and I could not imagine any other place for this special celebration of our Mother's life. Yes, this church is old and maybe a little small for this occasion but the spiritual feeling from being here provides an unbelievable amount of comfort for my family.
It is so important for me to speak tonight because my Mom- as you know - was a person who always focused on others. So I want to say loud and clear……"This is my Mother!" "She was a very special person and I want our voices heard in celebration of her goodness!"
In doing this I want to touch on 3 topics. First, why this place - a little historical perspective. Second some personal stories and third - my last day with her.
Historical perspective:
• She believed and so do I that "place matters"
• She worshiped here as child / young adult, played piano here – attended here so many times and for so many years. Many times when I was a child, we would come here for church and Mom and Grandma would stay home and fix dinner – having a great meal for us when we got back.
• Legend has it this church sits on land donated by my grandfather – George Brown.
• Directly behind me 200 hundred yards is the homestead of my Great, Great Grandparents, William and Elizabeth Smith – who came to the mountains from Alamance County because of an outbreak of typhoid.
• Up to the left is land from my Great Grandfather – John Calloway (Cal) Cudd – JC – a few hundred acres – most of which is still in our family (note – he was Rosa Alice Smith Brown's father. He and Ada V Smith never married but had 2 children together, Rosa Alice and Herbert – Herbert died while serving in WWI).
• Down the road 100 yards is Papa's / Grandma's house – George and Rosa Brown – we went there almost every Saturday growing up so Mom could help Grandma clean house and cook. Then later, she lived there with my Grandfather for the last for 8-10 years of her life, caring for him, before he passed at age 100
• Off behind me to the right and up the hill is a small cemetery – the Holcombe-Clouse Cemetery – holding the graves of her sister – Edith Eloise Brown who died in 1932 (1920-1932), her Great Grandparents [William (12/8/1839-6/25/1910) and Elizabeth Smith (10/8/1840-1/27/1923) and Lewis (8/12/1820-7/9/1901) and Anca (1/15/1822-6/18/1900) Cudd] and her Grandparents [Ada V Smith (12/1/1871-4/28/1976), JC (John Calloway)(1864-1934) Cudd] – and other relatives. (FYI – dates included only for info)
• In fact 2 of the hymns sung tonight were from Edith's funeral – I found them mentioned in some papers Mom had given me – they were "Sweet Bye and Bye" and "Jesus Loves Me. - Again closing and connecting her "circle of life" so closely back to "this place."
• As is the tradition here in the mountains, this church and the small cemetery have "Decoration Sunday" – I called it the "Decoration Party" every year – a wonderful memory from our childhoods – It was a party, big lunches at Papa and Grandma Brown's house just below the church; followed by time at the grave yard-cleaning graves, spreading flowers, learning about family history – and a chance to connect with lots of cousins and other relatives. One of the nice things about those experiences in the graveyard and "Decoration Sunday" was coming to better understand death as a part of life-a sad part, but a part.
Today, so many things about death are held from us – so we don't see the process - but in being denied involvement in and celebrating the lives of the dead – it makes it seem all the more scary.
• Lastly from a historical perspective – Mom has been a strong supporter of this church.
• So her history is here – our history is here and we believe a "sense of place "has been and is important to the foundations of our lives – what better place to "send her a message" to heaven than from here – this place.
Second: I want to speak briefly on some stories of my life with her that speaks to who she was as a person. As the obituary stated, she was a family centered, loving, caring, patient person (patience which I did try to break on many occasions) and finally a life-long learner.
• I will not rehash all the details about her education – but she was a life-long learner who wanted to experience the wonders of the world and share it with others – lately she satisfied this need by bus trips with Aunt Mary Ruth and Aunt Elezene and maybe others of you here. She loved the bus trips and all the great things she saw and experienced. One trip just last year, she and Elezene went to the west coast for 8-10 days and it was the first time Elezene had ever been on a plane. She was so excited that part of her "experience" for that trip was seeing Elezene on a plane for the first time.
• Lindsey – first grandchild – Her opportunity to make it known she wanted to be called "Granny" in honor of her "Granny" Ada V. Smith who meant so much to her. It was also her opportunity to see how much of her I had absorbed in my new role – me now as a Mom. With Lindsey she was able to enjoy – all the baby firsts again – all the way thorough to young adult hood. She marveled at Lindsey ability to learn another language and go to Spain and South America – another example of embracing learning and having new experiences
• Greg: Second grandchild and the opportunity to see what a wonderful father her son was becoming. She marveled at Greg's intensity, drive, focus and outstanding athletic ability.
• Kim: A whirl of energy – always doing things and taking initiative that impressed Granny, Granny marveled at Kim coming home, baking cookies, making phone calls and organizing events. Kim is our real mover and shaker.
• Mason – last but not least (if you have met him you know what I mean) – the grandchild who was most "like the Brown family" in his physical build. She marveled at his juggling 3 sports and school work. As Mason got to 7th grade, girls starting texting him and so he and Granny talked about that one day – he did not like them doing but she told him [with a twinkle in her eye] "if I was a 7th grade girl – I would be texting you too."
• To all the grandchildren – she loved you more than you can imagine. She was equally proud of each of you and had complete confidence in your abilities to move on and be a success in life.
• Next I want to highlight only a few things – I see these items more as quick visual images really versus stories and here they are.
• I remember picking blackberries on Papa's mountain (mountain top up on Brown Branch Road) every Fourth of July – sweating, ticks, chiggers, briars – that part was no fun but I sure loved the blackberry jelly.
• Then there was the picking – stringing and canning beans. Sitting under the trees in our driveway (N Main Street house), stringing beans and she would bring out what seemed like bucket after bucket. I learned very quickly that we had to be careful how I stringed them cause if I didn't do a good job then I only had myself to blame in the winter when eating beans and complaining about the "strings."
• I also remember the wonderful "soup mix" she canned each year that we mixed with hamburger for quick soups in winter time. Combination of tomatoes, potatoes, corn and okra)
• Bess Sprinkle Library in Weaverville – going there to get books, work on school projects. The whole world seemed contained in that library - so much to experience from all those books.
• I remember when the "encyclopedia salesman came to our house to sell us a set and she was so excited – it was important to her that we have a set – and we did – we used these a lot for projects but also just sitting around and reading them for fun – so much to learn from those books – for the younger set, the encyclopedia was our version of the internet.
• I remember sitting in her lap and learning to read with her arm around me – it felt so good.
• Then there were all the softball and basketball games – Coming to watch my every game through middle and high school. I always looked for her when I came out on the court of field and there she was. Sitting and sitting and sitting and watching hours of my events.
• Then homework and sewing lessons – by the way I got a new sewing machine last year – also Kim sews and Lindsey does some too. And Kim and Lindsey and I have been making peach jam for the last few years. Maybe we can get Greg and Mason into sewing or canning.
• My first trip to Myrtle Beach in spring 1966 and my first look at the ocean. I still remember that first image of the ocean, being amazed that there was no end to the water and how wonderful that was. Also she took us to a "statue garden" in the Myrtle Beach area – we were not very excited about that but she made it fun, letting us make funny poses and climb on the statues – much like these 4 grandchildren do now.
• But underneath these things, these events was her love, her patience and her pure joy in seeing and being with us.
• And yes, the education thing – she was always teasing me that "she was more educated than me" – I got my BA the same year she got her MA. I got my MA same year she got her Ed.S. Finally in 1994, I finished my Ph.D moving ahead of her in "degree attainment." But her teasing was not for competition, but pride in seeing that I, like her, loved to learn. All that "learning" can drive Lindsey and Mason crazy. When I argue with them at the house we start out with ….well the research says……….
Third my last day with her in March 2010:
• As you know we have had lots of rain this [2010] Spring. That's good but it makes the [55 Brown Branch Road] Hollar messy. I was spending the weekend in Asheville because of work I had here. Mom and I talked the night before and were not sure it would be dry enough to go the holler on Sunday but we really wanted to go. We got up Sunday morning, it was wet and messy but we decided "what the heck" let's go –we were up for it!
• First we had breakfast at Waffle House. Then we went to the Hollar and spent 2 or more hours walking and talking- some just talking about general things but some about her specific memories of living there – Papa's [George Brown] building 2 houses up by the Beech Spring before building the "big house" further down the mountain.
• Going to the Beech Spring and seeing where she craved her initials into the tree as a girl; plus seeing mine and the ones from the 4 grandchildren.
• Walking up the old road bed toward the top of the mountain where we used to pick blackberries. We were just enjoying being on land that had such personal meaning and beauty.
• When we tried to leave, we got her car stuck in the mud and we wound up having mud all over us. We considered calling AAA, but then Chris Smith (Nedra's Grandson) helped us push out her car.
• We were so muddy but we went on…… to the Holcombe –Clouse Cemetery behind us that I mentioned before – walking and talking - looking at the markers and talking about family – talking about getting Edith [her sister] a new headstone.
• We had lunch and then went back to her condo.
• I tried to clean her car a little at her condo – it was so muddy. I threw pails and pails of water on it to get some of the mud off. Finally I got enough off; that it was not too embarrassing for her to drive….it didn't look like she had competed in a "dirt" race with her Camry.
• But one thing struck me throughout the day. She must have asked me 6 times "do you have time for this" and of course the answer was "yes" – thankfully now I as I reflect on that day, that answer was "yes I have the time." It's funny, I could have easily rushed back to Winston Salem, I certainly had lots to do. But I really wanted to slow down and spend the day with her. Thankfully, the answer was "yes I have time."
• We had a wonderful day and I will always cherish that time – not more than the others but as the cherry, the finishing touch on top of all the others.
In closing I want to repeat the closing paragraph of her speech as Valedictorian of Barnardsville high School Class of 1949:
"We are not bound to make the earth go right, but we are sure we can realize our possibilities in being a part of all that liberates and lifts. Let us make loyalty our controlling spirit and show the world that we are the best citizens and truest patriots, carrying the spirit of courage and high minded integrity with which we must now bid each other farewell."
Thank you all for coming tonight and celebrating my Mom's life.
She was married for over 35 years and after several years of separation, the divorce was settled in about 1995.
Married to Wilfred Filmore Black in 1952, divorced abt 1995 after which time she had her name legally changed back to her maiden name.
Funeral held at Pleasant Gap United Methodist Church, the church she attended in her youth and later in life. She was a strong contributor to the renovation of the church that was undertaken in abt 2001.
Funeral held May 11, 2010 at 7 pm.
Funeral Service:
1. Opening and closing of service consisted of the ringing of the "Church tower bell" (by pulling rope attached to the bell). This was rung by her grandchildren both to begin and to end the service.
2. Songs included: Sweet Bye and Bye, Shall We Gather at the River, Jesus Loves Me, Joyful Joyful We Adore Thee, The Lord's Prayer, and Simple Gifts.
3. Eulogy by her daughter: Dr. Janice Black
4. Service conducted by Rev Beverly Colombo
Eulogy for Madeline Doris Brown
Funeral Service – Pleasant Gap United Methodist Church – Madison County NC
May 11, 2010 by: Janice Black
I want to thank you all for coming tonight and I especially want to thank the folks here at Pleasant Gap UMC for hosting this special occasion.
This church has meant so much to my Mother throughout her life and to her family and I could not imagine any other place for this special celebration of our Mother's life. Yes, this church is old and maybe a little small for this occasion but the spiritual feeling from being here provides an unbelievable amount of comfort for my family.
It is so important for me to speak tonight because my Mom- as you know - was a person who always focused on others. So I want to say loud and clear……"This is my Mother!" "She was a very special person and I want our voices heard in celebration of her goodness!"
In doing this I want to touch on 3 topics. First, why this place - a little historical perspective. Second some personal stories and third - my last day with her.
Historical perspective:
• She believed and so do I that "place matters"
• She worshiped here as child / young adult, played piano here – attended here so many times and for so many years. Many times when I was a child, we would come here for church and Mom and Grandma would stay home and fix dinner – having a great meal for us when we got back.
• Legend has it this church sits on land donated by my grandfather – George Brown.
• Directly behind me 200 hundred yards is the homestead of my Great, Great Grandparents, William and Elizabeth Smith – who came to the mountains from Alamance County because of an outbreak of typhoid.
• Up to the left is land from my Great Grandfather – John Calloway (Cal) Cudd – JC – a few hundred acres – most of which is still in our family (note – he was Rosa Alice Smith Brown's father. He and Ada V Smith never married but had 2 children together, Rosa Alice and Herbert – Herbert died while serving in WWI).
• Down the road 100 yards is Papa's / Grandma's house – George and Rosa Brown – we went there almost every Saturday growing up so Mom could help Grandma clean house and cook. Then later, she lived there with my Grandfather for the last for 8-10 years of her life, caring for him, before he passed at age 100
• Off behind me to the right and up the hill is a small cemetery – the Holcombe-Clouse Cemetery – holding the graves of her sister – Edith Eloise Brown who died in 1932 (1920-1932), her Great Grandparents [William (12/8/1839-6/25/1910) and Elizabeth Smith (10/8/1840-1/27/1923) and Lewis (8/12/1820-7/9/1901) and Anca (1/15/1822-6/18/1900) Cudd] and her Grandparents [Ada V Smith (12/1/1871-4/28/1976), JC (John Calloway)(1864-1934) Cudd] – and other relatives. (FYI – dates included only for info)
• In fact 2 of the hymns sung tonight were from Edith's funeral – I found them mentioned in some papers Mom had given me – they were "Sweet Bye and Bye" and "Jesus Loves Me. - Again closing and connecting her "circle of life" so closely back to "this place."
• As is the tradition here in the mountains, this church and the small cemetery have "Decoration Sunday" – I called it the "Decoration Party" every year – a wonderful memory from our childhoods – It was a party, big lunches at Papa and Grandma Brown's house just below the church; followed by time at the grave yard-cleaning graves, spreading flowers, learning about family history – and a chance to connect with lots of cousins and other relatives. One of the nice things about those experiences in the graveyard and "Decoration Sunday" was coming to better understand death as a part of life-a sad part, but a part.
Today, so many things about death are held from us – so we don't see the process - but in being denied involvement in and celebrating the lives of the dead – it makes it seem all the more scary.
• Lastly from a historical perspective – Mom has been a strong supporter of this church.
• So her history is here – our history is here and we believe a "sense of place "has been and is important to the foundations of our lives – what better place to "send her a message" to heaven than from here – this place.
Second: I want to speak briefly on some stories of my life with her that speaks to who she was as a person. As the obituary stated, she was a family centered, loving, caring, patient person (patience which I did try to break on many occasions) and finally a life-long learner.
• I will not rehash all the details about her education – but she was a life-long learner who wanted to experience the wonders of the world and share it with others – lately she satisfied this need by bus trips with Aunt Mary Ruth and Aunt Elezene and maybe others of you here. She loved the bus trips and all the great things she saw and experienced. One trip just last year, she and Elezene went to the west coast for 8-10 days and it was the first time Elezene had ever been on a plane. She was so excited that part of her "experience" for that trip was seeing Elezene on a plane for the first time.
• Lindsey – first grandchild – Her opportunity to make it known she wanted to be called "Granny" in honor of her "Granny" Ada V. Smith who meant so much to her. It was also her opportunity to see how much of her I had absorbed in my new role – me now as a Mom. With Lindsey she was able to enjoy – all the baby firsts again – all the way thorough to young adult hood. She marveled at Lindsey ability to learn another language and go to Spain and South America – another example of embracing learning and having new experiences
• Greg: Second grandchild and the opportunity to see what a wonderful father her son was becoming. She marveled at Greg's intensity, drive, focus and outstanding athletic ability.
• Kim: A whirl of energy – always doing things and taking initiative that impressed Granny, Granny marveled at Kim coming home, baking cookies, making phone calls and organizing events. Kim is our real mover and shaker.
• Mason – last but not least (if you have met him you know what I mean) – the grandchild who was most "like the Brown family" in his physical build. She marveled at his juggling 3 sports and school work. As Mason got to 7th grade, girls starting texting him and so he and Granny talked about that one day – he did not like them doing but she told him [with a twinkle in her eye] "if I was a 7th grade girl – I would be texting you too."
• To all the grandchildren – she loved you more than you can imagine. She was equally proud of each of you and had complete confidence in your abilities to move on and be a success in life.
• Next I want to highlight only a few things – I see these items more as quick visual images really versus stories and here they are.
• I remember picking blackberries on Papa's mountain (mountain top up on Brown Branch Road) every Fourth of July – sweating, ticks, chiggers, briars – that part was no fun but I sure loved the blackberry jelly.
• Then there was the picking – stringing and canning beans. Sitting under the trees in our driveway (N Main Street house), stringing beans and she would bring out what seemed like bucket after bucket. I learned very quickly that we had to be careful how I stringed them cause if I didn't do a good job then I only had myself to blame in the winter when eating beans and complaining about the "strings."
• I also remember the wonderful "soup mix" she canned each year that we mixed with hamburger for quick soups in winter time. Combination of tomatoes, potatoes, corn and okra)
• Bess Sprinkle Library in Weaverville – going there to get books, work on school projects. The whole world seemed contained in that library - so much to experience from all those books.
• I remember when the "encyclopedia salesman came to our house to sell us a set and she was so excited – it was important to her that we have a set – and we did – we used these a lot for projects but also just sitting around and reading them for fun – so much to learn from those books – for the younger set, the encyclopedia was our version of the internet.
• I remember sitting in her lap and learning to read with her arm around me – it felt so good.
• Then there were all the softball and basketball games – Coming to watch my every game through middle and high school. I always looked for her when I came out on the court of field and there she was. Sitting and sitting and sitting and watching hours of my events.
• Then homework and sewing lessons – by the way I got a new sewing machine last year – also Kim sews and Lindsey does some too. And Kim and Lindsey and I have been making peach jam for the last few years. Maybe we can get Greg and Mason into sewing or canning.
• My first trip to Myrtle Beach in spring 1966 and my first look at the ocean. I still remember that first image of the ocean, being amazed that there was no end to the water and how wonderful that was. Also she took us to a "statue garden" in the Myrtle Beach area – we were not very excited about that but she made it fun, letting us make funny poses and climb on the statues – much like these 4 grandchildren do now.
• But underneath these things, these events was her love, her patience and her pure joy in seeing and being with us.
• And yes, the education thing – she was always teasing me that "she was more educated than me" – I got my BA the same year she got her MA. I got my MA same year she got her Ed.S. Finally in 1994, I finished my Ph.D moving ahead of her in "degree attainment." But her teasing was not for competition, but pride in seeing that I, like her, loved to learn. All that "learning" can drive Lindsey and Mason crazy. When I argue with them at the house we start out with ….well the research says……….
Third my last day with her in March 2010:
• As you know we have had lots of rain this [2010] Spring. That's good but it makes the [55 Brown Branch Road] Hollar messy. I was spending the weekend in Asheville because of work I had here. Mom and I talked the night before and were not sure it would be dry enough to go the holler on Sunday but we really wanted to go. We got up Sunday morning, it was wet and messy but we decided "what the heck" let's go –we were up for it!
• First we had breakfast at Waffle House. Then we went to the Hollar and spent 2 or more hours walking and talking- some just talking about general things but some about her specific memories of living there – Papa's [George Brown] building 2 houses up by the Beech Spring before building the "big house" further down the mountain.
• Going to the Beech Spring and seeing where she craved her initials into the tree as a girl; plus seeing mine and the ones from the 4 grandchildren.
• Walking up the old road bed toward the top of the mountain where we used to pick blackberries. We were just enjoying being on land that had such personal meaning and beauty.
• When we tried to leave, we got her car stuck in the mud and we wound up having mud all over us. We considered calling AAA, but then Chris Smith (Nedra's Grandson) helped us push out her car.
• We were so muddy but we went on…… to the Holcombe –Clouse Cemetery behind us that I mentioned before – walking and talking - looking at the markers and talking about family – talking about getting Edith [her sister] a new headstone.
• We had lunch and then went back to her condo.
• I tried to clean her car a little at her condo – it was so muddy. I threw pails and pails of water on it to get some of the mud off. Finally I got enough off; that it was not too embarrassing for her to drive….it didn't look like she had competed in a "dirt" race with her Camry.
• But one thing struck me throughout the day. She must have asked me 6 times "do you have time for this" and of course the answer was "yes" – thankfully now I as I reflect on that day, that answer was "yes I have the time." It's funny, I could have easily rushed back to Winston Salem, I certainly had lots to do. But I really wanted to slow down and spend the day with her. Thankfully, the answer was "yes I have time."
• We had a wonderful day and I will always cherish that time – not more than the others but as the cherry, the finishing touch on top of all the others.
In closing I want to repeat the closing paragraph of her speech as Valedictorian of Barnardsville high School Class of 1949:
"We are not bound to make the earth go right, but we are sure we can realize our possibilities in being a part of all that liberates and lifts. Let us make loyalty our controlling spirit and show the world that we are the best citizens and truest patriots, carrying the spirit of courage and high minded integrity with which we must now bid each other farewell."
Thank you all for coming tonight and celebrating my Mom's life.
She was married for over 35 years and after several years of separation, the divorce was settled in about 1995.
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